Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, does this look like the face of someone who’s having fun on his very first Halloween?

….I think not.

For my first Halloween, it’s obvious that my MOMMY decided to dress me as a baby that was obviously freezing…how else could you explain the quasi Eskimo, polar bear-like outfit? Good thing my brother only went trick-or-treating for about an hour or who knows how much weight I would’ve lost in that sweat box of a costume.